cornual ectopic pregnancy

Just a month ago I was working on a blog for our new baby due July 8, 2009. I had actually started the blog back in June when I became pregnant with our first child. So, when I found out I was pregnant again, I was anxious to begin tracking our progress. We had taken a picture of me with my shirt pulled up over my stomach at eight weeks—standing in front of the Christmas tree. We had so much to be thankful for this Christmas. I was already dreaming of the next Christmas, knowing our baby would be 5 months old.

But near the end of my first trimester, we got news that I couldn't comprehend—something that I still can’t comprehend and won’t even begin to try comprehend.

I had a cornual ectopic pregnancy.

I was aware of the definition of an ectopic pregnancy, but cornual ectopic—I had never heard of it. And I didn’t have time to learn what it was. I had no time to feed my analytical brain that needed information, needed to understand how it happened, needed to know the cause and effect, needed to know how I could change the situation. All I knew of cornual ectopic was that it was out of my control and it meant I was losing my baby, and more.

After my cornual ectopic, I sought the information I hadn't had the time to get, however, there was minimal information on the Web. So, I want this to be a place where others who experience any form of pregnancy complication can come and know that they are not alone. I am not a medical expert, although I feel like I deserve some kind of certificate for all the doctor visits I’ve had; I am simply a mother who has lost two babies: one to miscarriage and one to a cornual ectopic pregnancy. I lost two babies in a six-month period. I lost my second baby two weeks before Christmas. My heart is broken, my body was confused … my soul was crying out for solace and peace.

But, I’m still hopeful. Even though the cornual ectopic was a devastating experience, and I continue to grieve the loss of my second baby, I have learned many lessons that I am grateful for.

"Beloved, build yourselves up on your most holy faith; pray in the Holy Spirit." - Jude 1:20